South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

So, it's time for the movie. Now, I'm gonna use my old review I wrote in finnish as a base here. Of course I'll translate it for you. It was written back in 2005.. Boy, what difference does four years do (I was 16 back then and took everything little too seriously). I was little too harsh on the film, but let's get to that when I've done the quoting:

"South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut is a horrific movie; It's bad even for a South Park. There's too much songs and it breaks the unity of the film. It would have been better of by just staying series. Half an hour a week is enough and only works when you're tired and can't think anymore. It's funny only partly when you watch it the first time and by the third time it makes you cry. The record of most swearing in an animated film is a terrible merit."

What a retard, right? Now, I just watched the movie and then checked back what I wrote back in 2005. I remembered writing it and where I found it, but I didn't read it in advance nor remembered what I said in it. Of course I remembered not liking it that much. But I must say that I am amazed how harsh I was. Now I'm not going to defend myself, otherwise this will become my defence speech instead of a movie review, so I'll just say, that I was second biggest douche in the world and just plain ignorant thinking I know something about something.

Now to commenting the movie itself. It's anything but horrific. It isn't bad for a South Park. It's actually very good. I can't really blame it for having much songs; it is a musical after all. I guess I didn't realize it. Besides, I don't know what crack I was smoking, the songs doesn't break the unity of the film, instead it makes it flow fluently. It's refreshingly different from the series and that's the way it should be - if it wouldn't, it could have been just few episodes at the start of the third season. I don't know how many times I've seen this film (probably haven't even seen it three times back then), but it's at least the four years I've last seen this film before today. I didn't remember it exactly, but some parts obviously. But it still made me laugh and definitely not cry. I can't really say that this movie is classic though, but still it's a good film and it leaves you feeling good after watching it - something that not every episode of the series can do. Now about the record the movie made - well the whole point about the movie is actually to say that swearing is not that bad. I guess they proved some point by managing to make good film after all that swearing.

If this is a musical then the whole point is the songs. Let's go over them.

It's starts with Stan singing "Mountain Town" and everybody at the town joining in while he's moving around. Now everybody probably knows this shit so I don't need to go over it all the time. It advances the story fittingly and you can't seem to get it out of your head after watching the movie. When I think about the movie, this song it the first that comes to my mind (Blame Canada close second).

Then after brief moment of usual cartoon Terrance and Phillip start to sign "Uncle Fucka" in the movie. Now this is a song that pretty much everybody knows. I remember that we had a record panel in school back when I was in the 6th grade. Somebody brought in this song and all of us kiddies loved it. In fact, I remember campaigning with couple of other kids briefly before we vote for it to win. South Park was cool (even though that back then I haven't seen the movie nor too much of the series) and "Uncle Fucka" was the shit. It had a landslide win at the record panel (If I remember correctly, the second in the record panel was Eminem's Under the Influence. Our favourite part was "So you can suck my dick if you dont like, my shit". Of course we all knew what that meant and that's why it was so cool again! But now I'm going too much off topic). So this was the song that all of us kids loved a lot and found funny. I don't find it that funny anymore, but it doesn't matter. As you can see from my off-topic, this brings me memories. I wish I was a kid again.

What the fuck am I writing, I should be writing a review, not a fuckin' memoirs. Now, see, that movie ruined my fuckin' language too. Time to "Blame Canada"... Wait a minute, no no. It's some couple of random, and useless songs in between. There's "It's easy, Mmkay", which is just plain tedious, but reveals something about what's Mr. Mackey really saying when he says "mmkay". Then there's Stan singing "Wendy's Song" (in fact, the Wendy's song comes first, I just fucked up somehow). This made me cringe back when I was little boy, in fact it's still too cheesy for me. Makes me want to throw up. Not in a same way Stan does, though.

Well, there's one fair song too before "Blame Canada". It's fuckin' James Hetfield singing "Hell Isn't Good". Should have been "Hell's Bad, Mmkay?" I don't give a shit about Metallica (even though I consider myself a metalhead), but it's approriate that Hetfield's doing this song and it really fits in.

Then FINALLY there's "Blame Canada". It's a catchy and memorable song, nothing special, but I like the rhymes and such. Nice little song and really advances the plot.

We hear a little bit about Wendy again, but then Cartman gets the show going on by singing "Kyle's Mom A Bitch". It's funny song, and completely true too, Kyle's mom is a big fat fuckin' bitch and we all hate him. She is actually the villain of the movie, after all. The different countries singing the song is a nice twist. The African version really made me laugh.

Then it's the "What Would Brian Boitano Do?" -song. This song embodies most the movie's song. It's catchy and fun, and the fact is that it's hard not to like it. I mean, it's like rainbows, everybody likes them, right? Same goes with this song and many other's from this movie. Some songs of course can be a little offensive, but if you get offended, you deserve to get, because you're a fuckin' jerk!

Satan singing then "Up There" is just ludicrous. This is a bit of a bore, and you'd rather fast forward it, because it doesn't advance the plot. Though it gives us insight about Satan's thoughts. So it's still not that bad.

"La Resistance" starts out bit annoingingly, but it's not the song, it's the fact that that arrogant Gregory piece of shit starts to sing it. It merges with the other song's becoming almost a "marathon" and then the song ends and the movie's climax is escalating.

Then there's bit from hell and Saddam sings "I Can Change". I don't really see why this made Satan change his mind about Hussein.

Then there's "I'm Super", by Big Gay Al. It's a bit gay for my taste, but what did I expect anyway?

Finally there's "Mole's Reprise" as The Mole dies and finally we'll hear again about the "Mountain Town and all's swell again. Now I'm not going to the credits with shit, this must be enough.

So, to the conlusion. It's a good movie. Not the best I've seen, not even the best cartoon I've seen, but I don't know whether it should be even compared to anything else. I'll come back to it some day for sure. I'm glad I did this review.

It's bigger, longer and uncut like the movie was. But as the show did, we'll start with the third season like nothing ever happened. Though the show's third season was already on air while this movie came out, but whatever, rather do this between the seasons.

As for the rating, not the South Park scale, I'll use my ordinary movie scale of 1-5 stars.. and it's ****

I'll be back with the third season's episodes soon.